Picking up directly from last week’s post, had I not experienced a couple of episodes of feeling crappy the month prior, the appointment with my doctor and the blood test that led to being admitted to hospital wouldn’t have happened.
In that scenario, it is very likely I wouldn’t be alive today to write my story.
It’s important that I share this, because of the gravity of what could have happened, but more importantly the gratitude that comes with things happening as they did, and the learning that’s come into my life as a result.
This life changing area of learning centers around just how much more complex self-care is than what many of us have been taught. It’s more than just work / life balance / integration, taking time for ourselves, sleep, what we eat and drink, and a balance of emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual wellness.
Yes, those are all important, but as I’ve learned, it goes so much deeper. At its foundational level is learning to give ourselves permission for self-care, that it’s okay, and in fact not selfish or self-absorbed, but instead, necessary.
In short, the lesson here is that you should unapologetically give yourself the same level of care you give to others.
I’d like you to sit with that for a moment.
Now, I invite you to say out loud: “I give myself permission to gift the same level of care I give to others to me. Making this choice isn’t selfish, or self-absorbed, but a gift I deserve to fully realize.”
Now, some of you will read that and say: “it’s not that easy Gareth” and my response would be “you’re right.” Balancing multiple responsibilities, competing priorities, life roles we each hold, and contributing to the wellness of others – whether that’s family members, partners, fur kids, and/or those we work with and serve isn’t easy. In fact, it is and will continue to be the biggest balancing act of our lives, and one that requires looking inward, actively working on areas of guilt and shame, practicing self-compassion and self-forgiveness, and living our values.
It is also an act that requires us to be conscious to our life choices, not writing off “insert symptom here” as just stress, and not waiting for a critical incident to happen to catalyze a change. It requires us to make changes – and this is key – before we have no choice.
But I’m getting slightly ahead of myself here.
While I do plan to write more about this topic and my journey, I need to back-up to the first question I wondered in the moments following being told I’d had a silent heart attack: How on Earth didn’t I notice?
Join me next week on October 7, as I share more about my learning from that question, some of the changes I’ve made in my life as a result, and a few questions I’d like to pose to you.